Sunday, 4 September 2011

Precaution – Ron and Ray Ride Again! Part 1

BB2500KM in 36 Hours



Bun Burner 2500KM
(Spot the mistake on the patch?)

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Friday 25th

Cock-a-doodle-doo, cock-a-doodle-doo, cock-a-doodle....................... CLICK!

“2 o’clock already, it can’t be!” (My first Big Mistake, who starts a 4 day ride at 2 in the morning?).

Up, washed, teeth cleaned, grollies & long sleeve t-shirt on, short sleeve t-shirt in hand, I say bye to Jeannie then pop in and kiss the little ones bye, bye. See you on Monday Pobsey see you Monday Ben look after your Mum & Sister for me, neither stir as I had down stairs.

Within 15 minutes I’m riding out of the garage heading for another “LD adventure” with my best mate Ron. I’m still wondering which way to ride to London, M62 then M6 or M1 when I remember the RBLR 1000 last week end & how great the A1(M) was, decision made. It’s off across the M62 straight into a 50mph single lane “Great”..............

Tootling along the M62 with the steady flow of trucks gives me time to recap what had gone into getting this far. It also gave me time to adjust this bloody balloon I’m sat on. Too much air in the Air Hawk and I’m nearly 2” in the air and moving around as if not even connected to the bike. It feels strange. Letting air out helps a little but at this early stage I’m not overly impressed (an opinion which would take almost 3000km to change) but change it did.

The new ear plugs, which had arrived in the post with the Air Hawk the previous morning, felt very comfortable but at 28db they are just too loud (note to self, only use on short ride).

Pulling off the M25 towards Tilbury I hit reserve, well chuffed 260 miles to the tank. I filled up at Morrison’s before heading to meet Ron who was up and ready for the off. Big Hug (manly of cause), a coffee & guided tour of his new BMW GSA, finally a radio check, something we ended up doing, A LOT!

It’s not long before we’re heading to Dover. Chatting away checking we have both got the same route, Ron is running in KM’s I’m in Miles.

“Ron, Ron, my radio keeps clicking when you try & talk to me”

“Ron.................................!” Here we go!

We pull into the next services on the A2,

“I can’t hear you”

“I know, I’ll check the radio, it keeps clicking when you talk to me”

“This isn’t a great start we’re not even out the UK yet”

“It’ll be right, it’ll have to be”

Switching my radio off & back on fixes the problem.

We arrive at Dover docks 5 hours early for our 1pm ferry, so after paying again for the next ferry we were on the dock side looking for our first ride witness’s.

So the plan, to attend the RTE in Gibraltar, riding an SS2000km there & a BBG2500km on the way back. Well that was plan A which changed to plan B, a BBG2500, then plan C, back to an SS2000 then to plan D, a SS1600 & finally to plan D, the BB2500 which were eventually complete the following night. Who says you can’t change your mind on the hoof? They are lying, we are living proof.

A couple of lads arrive behind us on the dock side, brilliant our Start Witnesses. It’s not long before we’re chatting & as soon as they hear what we are doing they are more than happy to sign our forms. So started our “Multi-National” Start / End receipt collection. Paul is a Canadian from Medicine Hat in Canada, a place Ron & I have both spent time in whilst serving as chef’s in the Army, Rod is an Italian.


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That's Paul our Canadian Start Witness behind the bikes.

The crossing consisted of a “Full English” with coffee and a very long chat with a bunch of riders heading to Assen for the racing. One thing becomes very apparent to us both as we chat with the other bikers. Everyone thinks we are mad!!! Riding to Gibraltar for dinner and a photo, “you must be bonkers!”

“Right come on let’s get a start receipt”

“OK, where to?”

“Calais!”

“I’ll follow you” (something I was to do for the next 4 days). It was Ron’s ride as he had planned the route & is collecting sponsorship for Bliss ( www.Bliss.org.uk ).

Start receipt obtained from Mac Donald’s we head back to the bikes. Ron sparks up a tab! 10 minutes later we’re heading south for Bordeaux. The roads are clear and we make good progress, “God” how IAM does that sound. Riding together is so natural as if we do it every day, filtering the same, steady away, taking in the French country side. The Garmin says we have at least 4 hours in the bag, will it be enough?

“How many signs are there for Bordeaux?”


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"It's that way"

I start counting but by 35 it’s quite apparent, the French just love putting up signs for Bordeaux.

“Ron, I fed up of France now”

“Yep, me too”

“How much further is it to the Spanish border?”

“About an hour”

“Sweet , can’t wait, fancy a coffee?”

“Yep, 25km do you?”

“Spot on”

We pull in for a coffee and notice the “time in the bag”, (arrival time before 24 hour dead line) is slipping away fast, time for a rethink possibly. We chat for a while about my next ride the European End to End which I have planned for July. The outcome being, we are going to ride it together next year. I know this is the right thing to do as I’m missing everyone at home, Ben as already told Jeannie he is missing his Dad doesn’t want him to go away again. This is my third ride in 2 weeks & I felt it when I was packing the bike up on Thursday morning. Torn between knowing I would be missing Jeannie, Lilie Rose & Ben & honouring my commitment to ride with Ron. One thing is clear everyone in the Walton household will be over the moon with this decision.

Decision made we will ride the European End to End next year.

Crossing the border was quick and easy & then the ride took on a whole new aspect.

I’ve ridden bikes all over Europe for years & I always thought Germany had by far and away the best roads, services and some of the best views anywhere. That was all to change in the coming few days. Spain is “amazing” the roads are out of this world. It’s as if the person who drew up the road plan for the whole of Spain was a biker. Long smooth curves carved out of the mountain side, tunnels with smooth sweeping bends in them, road surfaces like nothing I have come across outside of Germany. This was turning into a “dream ride”.


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Amazing Road although we rode down the mountain road, on the left which was even better, 
still the same road (Ron tells me!)

One constant reminder the down side of having roads that resembled well prepared race tracks were the never ending, “S”shaped skid marks, especially in the corners. All of which ended as abruptly as they had started, with a very shiny new section of steel crash barrier. The following day I was almost to become a shiny new section.

Heading south over the mountains we rode straight into a torrential rain storm which soaked us to the bone so we pulled into the services at 2 in the morning. Rocket fuel coffee & a quite a few strange looks from anyone who was still awake we put our clobber back on and started back out. Neither of us was very happy at the point. Within 3 hours I gave Ron the shout.

“Listen mate, I’m chin strapped, just had a big blink”

“I know what you mean, what do you want to do?”

“Times against us for the SS2000, but to be honest, I need to get my head down”

“Sorted, I’ll pull over at the next services”

“One good thing, at least it’s stopped raining”

Have you ever had that gut wrenching feeling when you just know things aren’t going to plan? Well I just got it right there on Autovia del Norte on the E5.

It was then that I started to drift, only slightly but enough.

“Big Lad, You OK?”

“Yes, I’m stopping here”

“Good!” I’d been on the road 27 hours, I needed some shut eye.

We pulled over into a service area which turned out to be

A) Closed,

B) Deserted, except for two other trucks &

C) Massive, with automatic switching football stadium flood lights all the way round.

It was like riding through the scene of the Matrix where all the lights come on as you pass them lighting your way, then switch off behind you just as fast.

We found a traffic island near one corner and pulled up at the side of it and got off. Doss bags out in a flash, the floor was already dry so with soaking wet clothes & boots still on I got in. Within a minute I was out of it. I woke to a glorious sunny day, bone dry and refreshed. Ron was having a tab and taking pictures of............. “me”.


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Wakee, wakee, rise & shine. Hands off c**** on socks.

Well that was the SS2000 out the window; we both got an end receipt for a SS1600 at the next services from a Spanish lad. He was taking his mates with their Huskivaria Trials bike, back home. Ron & I had packed up outside a MacDonalds for breakfast but on seeing the car park decided to cross the road with our bikes and get a sandwich from the garage. We parked either side the lads’ trials bike and showed them our print out of where we were going and where we come from. Yes, same response in Spanish as in English “You’re mad, for lunch and picture, Bonkers” but he signed the form and after Ron had finished his “tab” we hit the road again.

The radios behaved themselves quite well on the rest of the ride down to Gibraltar, that is until we were 52 km short of the rock.

“Ron you need to stay left ahead” Meaning stay in the middle lane and we would be OK!

No response and we’re almost at the fork in the motorway.

“RON! LEFT, LEFT, LEFT”

Oh stuff it , I carried on left, Ron right. He’ll be right I thought, round the roundabout at the bottom and back up. I pulled in a rest area. I waited, giving the radio a shout every few minute but knowing it would be useless. Lid off, mobile out, I called him

“Ron where are you?”

“Where are you?” Not the response I wanted but knew I was going to get!

“I’m parked up on at the next rest area”

“Why didn’t you follow me?”

‘I’d committed to the bend’ plus I was fed up of doing fly by’s. This was about the third so far, the Garmin 660 showed its true colours with the ‘lane assist’ giving me loads of time to react to junctions where as Ron was using the 550. The refresh rate is nowhere near as fast and with no ‘lane assist’ he had done well to only miss a couple of unimportant junctions.

Zooming out on the Garmin showed me that Ron would re join the motorway 5 km ahead of me so I set off to hopefully meet him at the next junction or toll. As it happened we had a number of fraught mobile conversations, very fraught at my end as one thing the Garmin 660 does not do well is connect my mobile very well, or it could be the boom microphone in my helmet. Well, to cut a long story short, we rode the last and most important 50 km alone into Gibraltar. Ron thinking I was in front and me thinking he was ‘somewhere’. I filled up thinking I was in Gibraltar, Ron rang.

“Are you in Gib?”

“Yes, I...............” The phone went dead!

As it happened I wasn’t. I was in Cadiz a metropolis of narrow one way streets, four way junctions and T junctions where whoever arrived at them first had right away. Mad!!! Going through customs at Gibraltar is quite bazaar, it’s like riding back though Dover with all the police in UK uniforms on the other side. I asked if they had seen a guy on a BMW GSA ride through, “Maybe”. That helped, -not!


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The Rock!

I arrived at the Lower Chair Lift in Gibraltar at 1745 hours, with 15 minutes to spare. Riding past I couldn’t see anyone but heard a bike horn, Phillipe. We shook hands and I explained Ron would be along shortly. We rode on the Europa Point, Phillipe leading the way, pullover slung around the shoulders like a local, cool as you like. All I could think about was “Where was Big Lad”.

As we rounded the last corner to the car park, low and behold there he was parked up. I was well chuffed,

“You Ok Big Lad?”

“Ron?” What’s up?”

“I’m pissed off”

Europa Point in Gibraltar was horrendous, the atmosphere was awful! Having known Ron so long I just left him to it.

“I’m knocking the ride on the head”

“Right, come and get you bike over on the picture”


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June European RTE 2010

Needless to say pictures were taken, farewells said as Phillipe was staying overnight at the hotel or at least till the early hours of the next morning when he would ride back to Switzerland.


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Africa (My favorite picture of the whole trip).

Lucky we had decided that a BB2500 Km was do-able and would regroup and plan the final destination in Gibraltar. Was this now going down the pan who knows.

Riding out of Gibraltar we stopped for fuel, I bought a couple of sandwiches, taking care to buy Ron’s favourites’, ham & cheese, I offered him one.

We rode round Cadiz three times looking for a cash machine eventually stopping at one on the second or third pass. I was getting really angry at this point which manifested itself as silence.

Gibraltar to Malaga was a very short, but felt like a long silent ride with the odd “Yes I’m fine” & “ OK” thrown in. Stopping at Malaga services to check mileage, something Ron & I differ massively about, Ron likes to know to the .00000th of the mile. Me I’m happy with adding 100 mile every 1000 rider. I left him to it.

“We need another 250 km to be 100% of verification”

“Fine”

“Do you want to call your mate? He lives round here doesn’t he?”

“No and yes, in that order”. God I can be a SH** when I’m hacked off.

“Right I’ll lead and when where 100km over the 2500km we can call it a day”

“That sounds go to me but I don’t want to be riding till midnight”

“No we should be there by 2300, Granada here we come”

Sure enough, after what felt like forever which in fact was only 1 hour & 43 minutes we pulled up at the services just North of Granada in a place called Diezma.

Obtaining the receipt was easy, pay for the fuel. The End Witness proved to be a lot more interesting.

As ever I just asked anyone who dare look at me for more than 30 seconds, the cashier, “No comprende”, guy filling up the same, group of Rumanian’s returning to their now fully fuelled camper, “A little”

A little is all I needed and before they could change their mind or take another step, the poor sod had a pen in his hand and was signing the form. Job done! Or was it.......... what do you mean you do not have a phone number. Thank you anyway.

“Ron we need another signature, he doesn't have a mobile or phone”

“There’s a hotel here, shall we get a room?”

“Bl**dy good idea, maybe someone will speak English”

The night manager using the international sign for sleep, Hands together, head laying on them at a jaunty angle did the trick.

“Yes, 1 room, 2 beds, Ok” Why does everyone on the planet understand OK?

“60 Euros”


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Taken the following morning, not bad for 30 Euros a night.

Room booked, End Witness signed, It was time for a shower and a beer, John Smiths came out my saddle bag. “Be Prepared” the Boy Scout in me coming out. Washed showered and Ron changed into shorts and t-shirt, me in clean grollies, t-shirt and bike trousers, spot who’s the Bigger Boy Scout! It was off to the bar.

2 beers, 2 bags of Haribo’s, 2 packets of salted almonds (I wonder if your other packet ever did fall out of the machine Ron?) a plan hatched for in the morning. SS2000 in 24 hours and it was off to bed.


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No prizes for guessing what I was about to sort out.

Mates again, separate beds mind .....................................           

A Tale of Ten Closed Roads............... “No Really, TEN!”

SS2000 in 48 Hours (incorporating End to End Gold)


SaddleSore 2000

“Oh Yes! SS2000 incorporating the End to end Gold.................... Come on!”

“Now that’s a plan” J

So then the fun really began, first the route, emailed to and from each other 5 times.

I had originally planned to set off from Rochdale head across M62, Down M1, meet up with Ron at Thurock services on M25, Clacket’s, M4, M5 Gordano & down A30 to LE. Back the same way but straight up to Glasgow on M6, then across Scotland to JOG, finally back down to Rochdale. Simple.................. ye right!!!

“How’s that sound?”

“No, not happy with that! We need to do at least 200 miles over, Belt & Braces”

“Why”

“cause the bikes odometer is wrong”

“so why is it there?” (Here we go again) “but yes your right, we don’t want to be doing all that and not get verified.”

“When are we going?”

“Sunday/ Monday 21st – 22nd Ok with you”

“Week after next, you don’t mess about do you? – OK, sounds good to me”

So we were set, I got my “Leave Pass” signed off with “Her who must be obeyed”.

Friday week before the ride..................................

“Can’t believe this”

“What?”

“my ***** grips have packed up, screens stuck halfway up but if I can’t get the grips sorted I’m not doing the ride. Bike is booked in for Tuesday at my local dealer” (who dully refused to repair them saying they were an after market addition).

“I’ll speak to Robi’s and bell you back” (Robi’s being where we bought the bike’s from ME!)

Upshot of phone call & a visit or two was that Ron came up the Friday before the ride and had grips repaired at Wigan Yamaha. The ride was brought forward by a day so we were not waiting about & most importantly the route was “Reversed”. This prompted me to incorporate a 2 hour sleep stop back in Rochdale. This was the best thing we did.

Kit packed, panniers & top box on, route up loaded to both Garmin’s & we’re ready for the off. So it was off up to bed, separate rooms mind, for the pre ride sleep. Bed at 2000 up at 2400 for a 0030 ride to petrol station for 0100 start.

Quick picture in the garage and we’re off......................................... start point being the 24 hour Shell Garage on Kingsway heading to M62


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1 mile down the road & only the second turn of the ride ...................... “Road Closed”

“can’t believe this, bl**y road’s shut for bridge repair at midnight”

It had closed 35 minutes earlier, we should have known right then we were in for a long ride. So first detour straight through Rochdale to Asda.

Asking the security guard in Asda to sign the start form was a stroke of geniuses, as the poor bloke looked like he was about to cr*p himself when we both walked in with helmets on. The front was up but just the look on the guys face told me he wasn’t a happy chappie. The 2 billies gave us the once over as they went about their reff’s no doubt wondering what Ron looking for. Glucose drink............. which sadly they do not sell.

So start form signed, tank filled, cash machine receipt numbered and start mileage on the back & tucked in wallet, done. Or in Ron’s case, Clip board with pen on a string with pocket on the back for receipts. Very impressive I thought, “made it myself” he says with pride, “can you tell I used to be a cabler” holding up the pen for inspection. “I’ll stick with my wallet, and pen velcro’d to the frame”. “Whatever”................. We love each other really!!!

Heading up the M6 near Carlisle I hear

“I can’t believe this, the grips have packed up again.”

“Your joking”

“Na, pull in I need to have a look”

The next thing is, half the front cover’s are off under a lorry fill up area and 45 minutes have gone with still no joy. I’m chuffed Rom decides to carry on, just means a few more stops in order to “re-heat the old finger end’s”


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Time for a warm up stop.

We make good progress through Scotland and it’s not long before we’re riding through Wick and on down into JOG’s.

It’s SHUT!!!




The Start of a Great Ride always starts at the "End"? I'm Looking forward to doing it the right way round Dan!

Luckily the cafe was open, so after taking a couple of pictures of the bikes (one of Ron’s lights for the US supplier) it was into the cafe for a massive coffee, so big the cup has two handles & the all important start receipt.


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There you go Mr US Supplier, best add you will get for the UK.

The old couple at the side of us & the only other customers as it happens, start telling us how there had been 62 mile an hour winds the previous day and how lucky we were.

“Would you be our ride witnesses?” which then requires a full IBA style explanation of what we’re doing.

“Is it for charity the old lady asks?” as she does no more than fill in both signatures with her & her husband’s details. I’m nervous but as ever Ron calms me down saying it’s OK.

A quick look in the gift shop for a sticker, (I like stickers) but they are all too big or just naph & we’re off back to mine for a kip.

Filling up at Wick I here Ron shout,

“Oh bl***y hell, look at the cafe receipt”

“Why, what’s up?”

“it’s two hours FAST!!!!”

“kin hell”

Sure enough, it says 1235 and the petrol station has 1135. Great start, Not!

“We’ll it gives us another 2 hours to get down there” I say knowing full well what’s coming

“NO CHANCE!!! We’ll just have to write a note, mitigating circumstances and all that”


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Action shot of Ron, not my best picture, Sorry Mate!!!


We stop off at the Triangle Services where Ron decides to have another look at the wiring for the grip & to my surprise finds the problem, a disconnected earth lead on the grips.

Ron’s in 7th Heaven & bursts into a jig on the grass bank, half scaring the young biker who is chatting to me about the Edinburgh Bike Show he is heading to. The lad tells me how he wants to ride round the UK Coast line, 5000 miles apparently. Just hope he gets a bigger bike....................... he’s on a Classic Harley Sporster.

The Oxford mitts we have both fitted are driving us both insane as they just keep moving and fouling all the controls. They stay on till the return trip from LE were we both took them off and stow away in top boxes vowing never to use them again.

We land back at mine spot at 2000 as planned, quick brew, (made nice with brandy) & it’s off for kip.

Jesus, how fast did that alarm go off, snooze, damn its 2240. Up shower, kit on & we’re pulling out the garage again at 2300 another fill up in Rochdale and off onto the M62, right onto the M1.......... and then the fun really began.

“IT’S SHUT!!!!”

“Ron, its F’ing SHUT!!!”

“Ron can you hear me? R........O..........N”

“Cause I can here you, why do you keep asking?”

“You never answer me!”

“That’s cause you never take your finger off the bl***y button long enough to get a word in!!!!”

“What’s SHUT?”

“The bl***y M1 is SHUT”

“Can’t be it’s the M1, it can’t be?”

“It’s say’s, M1 closed from junction 18 to 16 expect big delays”

“S......H.....*.......*!!!”

After what felt like an hour of silence I hear,

“right I know where we can go, A14 M11 down on to M25, sorted”

“that’s good with me, just take the lead and I’ll follow you!”

I bet the A14 is a great road when you A) know where you’re going & your sat nav is not saying

“AT THE NEXT JUNCTION TURN RIGHT, THEN TURN RIGHT”

“AT THE NEXT JUNCTION DO A U TURN”

Watching the millage get further & further from your destination & your arrival time, which up until that point had been an hour and a half ahead of schedule, suddenly says you have 15 minutes to spare is not a nice feeling.

I catch a glimpse of a sign and can’t believe it.

“Ron, the M11 is closed”

“na, where did you see that? It’ll have been a sign for the M1 again”

20 minutes later and with my sat nav now turned off, we arrive at the M11 round about,

M11 Closed for night working!!! This was the first time my head went down, just for a minute but it was the third closed road & was getting wound up, mainly by the sat nav telling me we were running out of time for the E2E Gold.

After riding about in the pitch black trying to follow my sat nav (which was unbeknown to me trying to send us back to the Northampton Services on M1) we pulled over for a “Chat”

“right its not looking good”

“nope”

“you Ok?”

“yes”

“no your not!”

“Ron, I’m ok”

“your pi***d off”

“listen its 187 miles home, the E2E Gold is going down the crapper and I’m sick of listening to the sat nav telling me to turn round, it’s not you right”

So the decision was taken to crack on down and get the SS2000 in the bag, then see how it pans out. I take the lead and start off in the direction of “Bl**Y Northampton Services” as I ride straight past the A1 M turning Ron scream’s

“Where you Going?”

“I’m lost and the sat nav say’s this way”

“well it’s wrong”

“so what do I do I have no idea where I am, all I can do is follow this heap of S***”

“Just listen, we head down A1/M onto M25 and ..................,

“A N D WHAT RON?”

“you know we just might make the E2E Gold................. come on this is going to happen”

All this on the hoof heading down the A1/M that to me had just appeared out of the blue, I’d seen it but was so obsessed with following “Dorris” I had just not registered the turning.

Ron worked out in his head that with the massive detour, the receipts collected from both stops on the way that we would not need to go the south circular via Clackets. We would have the miles, it was just a question of if we could make up the time.

As we pulled onto the M25 a miracle happened.

“Ron, guess what”

“Ron”

“what, sorry just working miles out in my head”

“stuff that, Sat nav back on and WE CAN MAKE IT”

“WHAT!”

“We can make it in time so if your mileage is right”

“Ye..... Ha!”

At that exact minute the ride all just made sense and I has as happy as I had been all the way round Scotland.

The ride down to LE was great, sun out, road almost empty and the thought of completing the E2E Gold ever present. The last couple of miles felt a little fraught as there are few passing places and when time is of the essence every parking car is a pain.

Luck was on our side and we arrived with 10 minutes to spare.

“ticket machine is broke, great”

“we can get a receipt in here” no you can’t especially when the woman at the information desk just tells you to go to the hotel to get your end receipt stamped. Thanks for your help love!


"Sorry Lad's you can't stop there, we have a helicopter coming in. Do you want a picture together?" Says the BIG Security guard.

"Yes Please, Mister"


Spotting the souvenir shop we both dive in to buy something.

“here you go Ron, a Land End pin with 874 miles on”

“Na milage is wrong we’ve done more than that”

“it’s a quid for Go** sake, and you can tippex the milage out and add your own”

We both crack up laughing.

“can I get a receipt please”

“cant believe this Ron, it’s wrong, it’s an hour fast, aaaaaaaaaaagggghhh!!!”

“can you just write the time on and initial it please”

“no problem”

We stopped at KFC for Lunch, Ron proceeds to check all the connections on the Starcom as we lost com’s heading down toward LE. After having a good rest and break we hit the road for the final 600 mile leg.


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Ron


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Ray

As we headed out the silence was deafening, no radio!

Pulling over in a lay by we have another one of our “moments”

“well it’s not mine, it must be yours”

“I’m not checking all them cables, can’t be arsed”

“well have a look”

“ listen, its not mine, let me have a look at the radio”

“Whoop’s................................. it’s switched off!!! Sorry my fault”

“you prat, I checked all those cables for nothing”

“Can you here me, Ron, can you here me?”

“No..................... ow’d on, HO SH**!”

“what’s up”

“my radio’s switched off an all”

We both simultaneously fall about laughing, yet again................... “Priceless!”

Other than a prat in a Black Range Rover Sport trying to squash me on the M25 as we filtered round nothing really happened until we were heading up the A1 in the pitch black.

Ron’s spots gained a mind of their own and flashing full beam for no apparent reason.

Pulling over straight away onto a very narrow hard shoulder we cover them with paper and masking tape.

“Here’s hoping now’t else goes wrong” Ron says..................... famous last words.

“R – O – N, ....... RON HELP!!!!”

“what’s up now”

“HELP me I’ve DROPPED MY BIKE”

“QUICK It’s on my leg, I can’t move”

Leaning over to plug my intercom in, I had that awful feeling, this is not right, sh** it’s falling!!!

I grabbed the bar end in an attempt to hold her but by this time I was down, right hand and leg pinned to the deck............................. “thank G*d Ron was quick off the mark to lift the Beast off me, I jumped out and helped get her up straight.

(Thanks’ Big Lad, you’re a bl***y star)

Riding back into the pitch black A1 I suddenly realised how bad that could have been, if I had been alone. My head was 2 foot from the carriageway, pitch-black with hazards on.

“It could have been....................... bl***y hell, I wouldn’t have been there if it wasn’t for your bl**y lights.............. Cheers Mate!”

We just crack up laughing, swearing, laughing and cursing at every truck that flew past us at 90.

We sat at a very steady 70mph for another hour then pulled into a Little Chef for a brew, to be met by a couple of traffic police, we had parked at the side of their un-marked BMW.

“Just as well you’re in here; you would not want to see what he has just been doing coming up that road!!!” Ron says to them as they both look us up and down. We all crack up laughing.

“Cheers MATE!”

It’s now about 2100 & 44 hours into the trip, I don’t think Ron will mind me saying this, but we are both feeling it a little & then to top it all off we have one of those bizarre conversations with the waitress.......................

“2 coffees love”

“OK”

“can we get two receipts?”

“I’ve done the bill”

“No! We NEED two receipts”

“I know I’ve done the bill”

“N_O!!! We NEED two...............separate, like one coffee on each”

The waitress looks at us as if we had just asked if we could borrow her 18 year old daughter for half an hour to give us both a massage!!!

“Why?”

“we’re doing a ride and need proof we were here, is that ok?”

“right, leave it with me I’ll sort it somehow” (Big sigh as she stomps off to the till).

Bill paid, Receipts collected and were off again.

Up the A1 thinking all is done and yes you’ve got it................. “Road Closed”

So into yet another detour right around Doncaster following a couple of trucks, unreal.

M62 felt like heaven, lights, three lanes, no road works............ whoops I speak too soon.

Heading home and low and behold, were diverted off the motorway at junction 29 M1 turning “M62 Closed” I happy to report it was just the junction and we drop back down onto the M62 without incident.

Last stop was just after Leeds on the M62 were Ron announces

“that’s it we’ve done enough, get an end receipt and it’ll save us faffing in Rochdale”

“music to my ears”

After a drink we head back to the ranch.

Job done!

Coffee made nice, half a rack of ribs each and it’s off to bed for a well earned sleep.


UK End to End Gold


Now for the boring bit.

2192 Bike Miles, 2124 Garmin miles ridden

42h hours & 36 minutes on the go, less 2 one hour breaks, a 3 hour sleep stop plus numerous road side breaksas required

13 receipts collected in total

Fuel consumption 48 mpg (Well chuffed with that!).

Lessons learned

1) Check time on receipts as soon as you get them - imperative

2) Don’t bother using mitts unless its extreme cold there crap

3) Switch your radio on before checking all the connections on the intercom box under the seat

4) Check were your Sat Nav is sending you don’t just follow it once you’ve taken a detour

5) Don’t fall over while connecting Intercom

6) Two minds are more argumentative than one

7) Finally do not believe your odometer, it’s WRONG! Unless you’re a billy who’s had it calibrated. J

Hope I’ve not bored you all too much & the report has kept you amused enough to bother reading it all.

Thanks for the company Ron, you’re a star. Just pleased we know each other enough to know when to stop arguing about odometer readings..........................           

Wednesday, 31 August 2011

2012 Tour de Europe .................. and so the planning begins.

Well folks, thought I would let you into my 2012 Tour de Europe Plan.

As some of you may or may not know, next year I will be clocking up the half century, the Big 50!   

To celebrate the fact I've lasted so long I am planning on riding a loop of Europe taking in 25 countries, covering 8000 miles and having a very plesant 2 - 3 week ride at the same time.
At the minute it is all at the planning stage but I thought I would give you all the heads up.

Here's the proposed route, but as with all good plans things will no doubt change over the coming months.

Posted Image


I'll keep you posted as things progress  

Thursday, 25 August 2011

Trinity August Update........... Sadly, not a lot to say mind!

Well after a very nice two week break in Spain I thought it about time I started pulling the parts of Trinity back together again.

Trinity is still in Johns workshop at Kawasaki Rossendale and I am awaiting a call now to go and collect her.

The "Tank" sager runs on and on and on. Having had yet another protracted conversation with "Daz" this morning who informed me that the same issue has re-occurred! The bubbles are back and in the same places, if not quite so large! Personaly I find this simply unbelievable. The next step is for Darren to find a vinyl graphics specialist who they hope will be able to reproduce the same colours as a stick on graphic, again something I paid extra not to have, or I thought I did! It has now been 8 months since I took the fairings on the 27th of January to Dream Machine. I am sadly disappointed with their service, no mater what the outcome of the tank. 8 months is far too long to be waiting for a respray, even if I am in no great rush to complete Trinitty.

I also dropped Adam an email to check progress of the carbon parts. As he is in the USA I will no doubt recieve an answer later in the week. Finger crossed it will be more good news.

To finish on a high note, I had a fantastic conversation with a gentelman who will remain namless (untill I have his permission to publish it) about producing a quality exhaust for Trinity. Further details will follow in due course.

So folks all in all, not the best of ring round days but as they say, "All good things come to those that wait!"


Wednesday, 3 August 2011

Fitting Metal Mule Panniers to Mr T

Well after the bike falling over in France and the original lower pannier bracket not withstanding the fall I have chosen to fit the Metal Mule Panniers I bought to sell on.

The rack arrived well packed with a thick plastic coating holding the metalwork in place and the box filled with scrunched up card. What made it better was it arrived within 3 days of ordering on line. This combined with an article appearing in the MCN last week I knew I had made the right decision to fit them.

The box contains :-
  1. Two metal frames
  2. One cross member
  3. Four aluminium spacers
  4. Alan bolts, washers, nuts, bolts and plastic nut covers
  5. Clear and detailed fitting instructions


I liked the way the cross member, spacers and
fixings are all in a  plastic wrap.


First job remove original panniers.


There are two original brackets which are very flimsy. 


Tools required for removal of original brackets and fitting the Metal Mule pannier rack. 
  1. 6mm Tamper Alan key - I borrowed one from the guys at All Bikes of Rochdale
  2. 8mm Alan key
  3. 6mm Alan key
  4. 5mm Alan key
  5. 13mm spanner x2
  6. 10mm socket
Remove the heat shield using the 10mm socket for the top nut and the 5mm Alan key for the two retaining bolts.


Have the frame ready to offer up to the bike.


Remove the original lower pannier bracket but leave the steigthening bar in place
(Note - if you do not already have original panniers fitted you will be required to purchas this)
Replace the black alan bolt but leave the lower whole free.


Remove original upper pannier bracket complete with hand grip
using 6mm alan key and 6mm tamper alan key.


Repeat on other side.
This is what you will have
Re-fit in exactly the same order but replace upper bracket
with supplied Metal Mule Rack, 8mm alan bolts and spacers.
  1.  Hand guard
  2. Washer, shaped washer goes to the front
  3. Original spacers, the original spacers are two different lengths. Replace these with Metal Mule spacers of same length
  4. Upper pannier bracket
  5. Washers
  6. Alan bolts one standard rear one is a tamper proof bolt requiring correct alan key


Re-fit the rear foot peg followed by the heat shield.


Attach Metal Mule Rack loosly on the 8mm black alan bolts at the top
in the same order as removed but using the supplied aluminium spacers
and 6mm alan bolts at the bottom.


Attach cross memeber using 13mm nut and bolts
slide on black plast caps.


Repeat on the other side then tighten all fittings.


I double checked to see alignment was correct.


Finally attach the panniers



Very nice thank you very much.


Best bit of all I have gone from this!



To this.............. loads of space
and on both sides too!


I just need to get the Top-box rack sorted now.

All I can say is fitting the rack was an absolute breeze.
Well done to the folks at Metal Mule for producing a great peice of kit.
I wish all my "farkles" went so well.